I'm a Guest Blogger! - Tips for Personalizing Your Wedding Ceremony

I was invited by the wonderful Greatest Expectations to write a blog post about personalizing your wedding ceremony. So, of course, I did!

The article covers several ways to make your ceremony a reflection of the two of you, including music, readings, and unique rituals. 

Photo by Julia Franzosa Photography

So, what are you waiting for?

Head on over and read my article, The Perfect “I Do” for You- How to Personalize Your Wedding Ceremony 

Sonny & Sam's Gorgeous Outdoor Ceremony

Samantha & Sonny were married this past July at the lovely Royal Melbourne Country Club. The ceremony took place outside, under a wedding canopy adorned with a chandelier. It was exquisite! 

Their ceremony was a lovely blend of traditional and contemporary, and included a sand ceremony as well as a tea sharing ritual, in honor of Sonny's Chinese heritage. 


This beautiful wedding was featured on the Angel Eyes Photography blog, which you can see HERE! 

Gorgeous Interfaith Wedding

This spectacular wedding was featured on the BRIDES website. The couple combined elements from their Jewish and Hindu backgrounds in the ceremony, which was officiated by a rabbi and a Hindu priest. A lovely example of how different cultures can be combined to create a beautiful and meaningful ceremony.

The gorgeous photos are by one of my favorite photographers, the awesomely talented Oriana Koren of Okrfoto. Click HERE to see more.

Photo by Okrfoto

Jessica & Sang-Woo's Multicultural Ceremony at Greenhouse Loft

The couple posing at same spot where Sang-Woo proposed.

This is long overdue, but I am finally getting around to sharing some details of Jessica &; Sang-Woo's gorgeous wedding from September of 2012. (I told you this was overdue!)

A true Chicago couple, their wedding took place at the wonderful Greenhouse Loft, with the ceremony outside on the lovely patio.

Photo by SnoStudios

Sang-Woo and Jessica's ceremony was a true reflection of them as a couple. They shared their love story, including how they met by chance (or maybe fate!) at John Barleycorn and the sweet and funny story of Sang-Woo's proposal outside of the Field Museum. They both value the importance of family and made sure to include their parents in the ceremony. They also incorporated Korean wedding traditions in honor of Sang-Woo's heritage.

Wine sharing 

Happy tears during the vows. Photo by SnoStudios

One of these traditions was a wine-sharing ceremony. In a traditional Korean wedding, a couple will sip wine that has been poured into two halves of a gourd, traditionally grown by the bride’s mother. When the wine is sipped, the two halves of the gourd are symbolically reunited and made whole, representing the joining of two lives.

In honor of this ritual, Sang-Woo and Jessica shared small cups of wine, presented by Jessica’s mother.

Parents tossing chestnuts & jujube fruits for Parents' Blessing
Photo by SnoStudios

Another important Korean wedding tradition is the Parents’ Blessing. In this ritual, the couple’s parents bless the couple by "showering" them with wishes for many children. They do so by tossing nuts and fruit at the bride and groom, who will try to catch them in a wedding cloth. The number caught represents how many children the couple will have. 

I'm happy to report that this ritual was a success - Jessica and Sang-Woo have a beautiful new baby boy!

Guests writing wishes on the wishing stones
Photo by Anita Vaughan

At the end of the ceremony, guests were asked to stop at a table with river rocks and write their wishes for the couple on the rocks. A wonderful keepsake for the couple!

This wedding had so many lovely elements - but the best part? The bride and groom! I had such a wonderful experience working with Jessica and Sang-Woo and seeing their ceremony take shape. They are two of the nicest people you could ever hope to meet - and they know how to have fun!!





Thank you to SnoStudios for generously sharing these photos. And, of course, I have to give a huge shout out and thank you to Heather of Greatest Expectations Special Events and Weddings. She made everything run seamlessly - and made it all utterly gorgeous!

Incredible sweet table! Photo by Anita Vaughan

Congratulations on the birth of your son, Jessica & Sang-Woo! He is one lucky little boy to have you two as parents!

Adorable flower girl! Photo by Anita Vaughan

The Babies are Coming!

It looks like 2013 will be the Year of the Baby! A few of my past brides are expecting, as well as a friend of mine. I'm just dying to hold and snuggle these new little ones. I'm SO excited, I can't even stand it! 

I'm so thrilled to have been asked to create ceremonies to welcome some of these new little friends into the world. Have I mentioned lately how much I love being a Life-Cycle Celebrant? Best. Job. EVER!

And now that I'm in baby mode, I wanted to share some really cool ideas for any new mamas in your life.

I know a lovely woman by the name of Amy, who is not only a very cool mom, but also a Childbirth Educator and the creator of some very cool products & services for parents and babies, available through her website, Nakita Baby.

One of my favorites is henna for your belly! If you know anything about me, you know I LOVE henna! Why didn't I know about this when I was pregnant???

This beautiful artwork could also be incorporated into a wonderful mother blessing ritual. 

And if you do the henna belly, why not get a matching onesie for the baby?

Another fabulous offering is the belly cast, which can also include a henna design. What a wonderful keepsake for an expectant mother!

In addition to these great items, there are also other goodies, including custom-made baby slings. Be sure to check out all of the fantastic products from Nakita Baby by clicking HERE. A great opportunity to do some LOCAL holiday shopping.

And to all those babies coming soon - I can't wait to meet you! 

Carrie and Jamil's Ceremony with Bengali Traditions

This past spring, I had the honor of officiating the wedding ceremony of a terrific couple, Carrie and Jamil. Not only were they two of the nicest people you could ever meet, they were super fun to work with! Funny and thoughtful, they made my work such a joy.

They hosted their wedding celebration at the amazing Zed 451. The ceremony took place in a lovely, open room with a fireplace as the backdrop, creating a warm and intimate atmosphere.

Jamil's family hails from Bangladesh, so we incorporated traditions to honor his culture. The first Bengali ritual was Shuvho Drishti, in which a mirror is placed in front of the couple, symbolizing them looking into the future.

They are asked what they see in the mirror, to which they respond, “I see the rest of my life.” This was followed by the tradition of sharing sweets, representing the sweet life they will share together. So beautiful!

I love when couples choose to incorporate rituals from their cultural backgrounds. It's such a meaningful way to create a personal, unique ceremony.

Carrie and Jamil, thank you so much for letting me share in your beautiful wedding. It was wonderful!

And a huge thank you to their amazing photographer, Liesl Diesel Photography, for sharing these gorgeous photos. You can see more incredible shots from Carrie & Jamil's wedding on the Liesel Diesel Facebook Page.

The Julies Get Married!

Last weekend, I had the pleasure of officiating the ceremony of Jule G. and Julie S. at Casa Royale in Des Plaines. But, to keep track of who we were talking about, they were known as Julie and Julene for the ceremony.

I've lived in Des Plaines for over 10 years, and I'm probably the only person in town who hasn't been to Casa Royale. I was always curious as to what it looked like inside, and I have to say that it was lovely. But, by far, the best part of it was the fantastic staff. From Lynn, the friendly and helpful wedding coordinator, to the wait staff who made sure everyone was taken care of, the service was really fantastic!

As for Julie & Julene's wedding, the ceremony began with them each being escorted down the aisle - Julie by her parents and Julene by her son. The bridal party followed, which included Julene's daughters. All three participated in the handfasting later in the ceremony.

Julene and Julie's story was sweet and romantic, reflecting how deeply in love they are, and the strong bond they share.

They exchanged vows under the Chuppuh, which I explained as follows:

Julie and Julene are exchanging vows under this wedding canopy, known as a Chuppah in the Jewish tradition. The Chuppah represents shelter - the home the couple will build together, as well as the home each has built in their hearts for their beloved.

As you’ll notice, the sides are open, just as their home and arms will remain open to you, their family and friends.

The four poles correspond with the four directions - north, south, east and west - just as their love reaches to the four corners of the world.

At the end of the ceremony, we had planned for the traditional breaking of the glass. The only problem was that the glass that Julene had to step on was virtually unbreakable! She tried several times, and then Julie took a turn. Even Julene's son got in the act, but to no avail. After much laughter, Julene tried again, and the glass broke. Whew!

Julie and Julene, I really enjoyed being a part of your special day. After the struggles with that glass, the rest of your days should be smooth sailing!

I wish you and your family a lifetime of happiness and love!

Wedding Profile: Mangesh & Raquel's Colorful Spanish-Indian Celebration at Baha'i Temple

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of officiating the wedding ceremony of Mangesh and Raquel at the Baha'i Temple in Wilmette.

Mangesh, a native of India, and Raquel, from Spain, had a wonderful, multicultural ceremony. It was such a delight to be a part of this celebration!

The ceremony included readings in Spanish and Hindi, as well as a reading of Seven Wishes, as a nod to the tradition of the Seven Steps, or Saptapadi, of Indian weddings. Seven of their friends shared blessings for the couple, in English and Spanish.

One of my favorite touches was that Raquel's wedding flowers were presented as a part of the ceremony. Rather than walking in with a bouquet, she was given flowers after her entrance, by her parents and sister, and Mangesh's parents and brother. The long-stemmed roses were gathered in a bunch and Mangesh tied them together with a red scarf - from Raquel's hometown in Spain. It was a beautiful symbol of the joining of their two families and cultures.

And, last but not least, take a look at Raquel's incredible dress! Mangesh brought it back for her from India this summer. It was unbelievably beautiful, with delicately intricate beading and embroidery. I made sure to take a picture so I could show my mom. As a seamstress, I knew she would appreciate the amazing details. And she did. (There was much ooh-ing and ahh-ing.)

The wedding was a spectacular sight - a gorgeous feast of colors amidst the grand beauty of the temple. A wonderful experience I'll never forget!

Congratulations, Raquel and Mangesh!

I wish you all the best - I know you will have a long and happy life together!

Erin & Nate's Wedding - Bagpipes and Tartan Ties!

Yesterday was a lovely day for a wedding - despite the rain! Erin and Nate were married in a ceremony at the Naper Settlement chapel. I was really excited about this ceremony, as it allowed me to do more research into pagan rituals and holidays. I found it all so fascinating and I've been quite taken with the beauty and richness of the rituals.

I love my job!!! (sorry, I had to let that out!)

It was May 1st, known as May Day, which is also the Pagan holiday known as Beltaine. It's the day the fairies awake from their slumber and the curtains between the earthly world and the magical world are most translucent. It's a day that celebrates rebirth, life.... and love. A great day for a wedding!

The groom and his groomsmen were handsome in their tuxes, with the added detail of tartan ties. Very dashing! A bagpiper played as the bridal party entered and then led the beautiful bride and her father down the aisle. This was my first experience (as a Celebrant) with bagpipes included in the ceremony. It was truly breathtaking!

The ceremony included a handfasting ritual, in which their friend Jan handled the cord duties. She also made her own blessing, which was a lovely touch.

The ceremony ended with the bagpiper leading the way. When the couple walked down the chapel stairs, they were greeting by their friends and family waving colorful ribbons. I don't think anyone even noticed the drops of rain.

Congratulations, Erin and Nate! Thank you for letting me be a part of your day!

Make Your Own Ketubah

If you are thinking of ways to honor your Jewish heritage in your wedding ceremony, you want to consider a ketubah. The signing the ketubah, or marriage contract, during the ceremony is a lovely way to acknowledge your heritage, and serves as a meaningful unity ritual for the couple.

If you're the crafty sort, New Ketubah offers detailed instructions to make your own ketubah on the website. This detailed section offers information to get you started with a variety of articles from Hebrew lettering to framing your ketubah. There is even a DIY Ketubah Kit to download! You can't ask for more.

But, if you're not up for another project before your wedding, New Ketubah has gorgeous handcrafted ketubahs which can be ordered online. See the collection of their designs here.

The images here are samples of just two of the designs available.

A Wedding Profile: FELICIA & IMTIAZ

This past July, I had the honor of marrying a wonderful, creative couple named Felicia and Imtiaz. The bride and groom come from different backgrounds - he is from India and a Muslim, while she is American-born and Jewish. These two backgrounds proved to offer many rich and meaningful rituals which blended beautifully. I can't tell you how much I enjoyed researching traditions and writing the ceremony!

The wedding was held at the beautiful and funky Architectural Artifacts, with the ceremony taking place outside in the courtyard. The bride and groom wore tradition Indian attire for the ceremony, and Felicia carried a gorgeous fuchsia bouquet - which she made herself. I couldn't help myself - joining in spirit of things by wearing a red and gold salwar kameez that I had my mom sew for me (thanks, Mom!) and I had my hands hennaed.

The couple exchanged vows under a Chuppuh which was custom-made and included bits of fabric from both the bride and groom's clothing. Felicia's friends read a version of the Seven Blessings, during which the couple shared a glass of milk (a Hindu tradition). Felicia and Imtiaz took the idea of a stone blessing ceremony and turned it into a wonderfully personal and unique ceremony where guests placed blessings and well wishes on packets of soil, which were collected while dj Harsh Singh played "Your Good Name" by Mychael Danna, from the Monsoon Wedding soundtrack.

Felicia's parents joined the couple for a water pouring ceremony, which involved them pouring water over Imtiaz and Felicia's hands, and into the potted plant, to which the packets of soil had just been added. It was a beautiful way to tie together traditions and actively involve guests and family in the ceremony.

Following the vows and ring exchange, Felicia and Imtiaz exchanged fresh flower garlands made by Imtiaz's aunt. The ceremony concluded with Imtiaz breaking a glass (the same glass from which they drank the milk earlier) and guests shouting out "Mazel Tov!"

It was a gorgeous wedding for a wonderful couple who touched my heart from the moment I met them - and who I know will enjoy a lifetime of happiness and love.

Thank you to photographer Chris Ocken from Ocken Photography for sharing the lovely photos!

Breaking the Glass & Putting it Back Together Again!

I came across Mazel Tov Glass when researching Jewish wedding traditions online - and was completely awestruck!


I just love this concept. You order a beautiful, delicate, hand-blown glass for the glass-breaking ritual at the end of your wedding ceremony. The glasses are available in a variety of colors and are sent to you in a velvet Mazel Tov bag imported from Israel.


After the ritual, the glass shards are collected. You send them back to Mazel Tov Glass and they use the broken pieces to handcraft a stunning glass keepsake. You can choose from a variety of vase or bowl designs, or you can choose to have a glass creation custom made, such as the glass flowers in the bottom photo.





What a lovely way to celebrate a wonderful wedding ritual - and to have a keepsake that will always be a reminder of your wedding day.

Indian Wedding Music

I recently came across the topic of music for Indian weddings on Maharani, an Indian wedding blog I follow. Check out the posts on this topic for ideas on great songs for an Indian-themed wedding. One of my favorites, suggested for a processional by Shawna, the blog's author, is the song, "Jashn-e-Baharaa" by Jodhaa Akbar. Listen to it here:

Friday Q & A: Greek Wedding Traditions

Question: What are some Greek wedding traditions that I can use in my wedding ceremony?

Answer: Greek wedding rituals became more popular with the release of the 2002 movie, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." (Which I could relate to, having had a semi-big fat German wedding!)

What's great is that more couples have become open to embracing their ethic backgrounds when planning weddings. Not only is it fun, but it can give you a deeper appreciation of family traditions.

There are several Greek rituals than can be incorporate into a ceremony, even if you're not having a traditional Greek Orthodox wedding.

Some Greek brides have bouquets that include ivy, which is a symbol of eternal love.

In Greek Orthodox weddings, the bride and groom are known to exchange crowns, or Stephana, which are flower wreaths, connected by a ribbon.

To conclude the ceremony, the bride and groom are offered honey and walnuts on a silver spoon. The honey represents sweetness and fertility, while the walnut, which can be broken into four parts, represents the bride and groom and each of their families. You may choose to update this tradition by instead sharing a taste of honey walnut cake, or karythopita.

FRIDAY Q & A: Hawaiian wedding traditions

Question: What are some Hawaiian rituals that can be used for a wedding?

Answer: Even if you're getting married right here in Chicago, you can have an island-themed wedding. Here are some rituals to infuse your ceremony with Aloha spirit:

Exchanging flower leis: The bride and groom exchange flower leis (or garlands), which is related to the idea of exchanging rings. The circle shape of the leis represent eternal love.

Ring Blessings: Hawaiian wedding include a ring blessing, in which the officiant has a Koa wood bowl filled with water. Koa is a revered hardwood, and represents strength and integrity, the foundations of a good marriage. A Ti leaf, symbolizing prosperity and health, is dipped into the bowl. The water from the Ti leaf is sprinkled over the wedding rings three times, while the officiant recites the blessing, "May peace from above rest on you and remain with you now and forever."
Hawaiian attire: Traditional Hawaiian weddings call for the bridal couple to both wear white. The bride wears a white holoku, while the groom wears a white billowy shirt with white pants, and a colored sash (usually red) around his waist. It is now common for the groom and groomsmen to wear Hawaiian shirts. The bride also commonly wears a ring of flowers, or huku lei, around her hair.

Check my post Hawaiian wedding - in Chicago? for more tips on planning a Hawaiian-themed wedding.

Chinese Wine Ceremony

One of my favorite things about being a Celebrant is learning about the rituals and ceremonies from other cultures.

As you may probably know, many cultures have some type of wine ceremony for weddings. Recently, I learned more about the Chinese wine ceremony. I had picked up the book, "Wild Geese and Tea- An Asian-American Wedding Planner," by Shu Shu Costa, in order to learn more about Chinese weddings. In my reading, I came across the details of this particular wedding ritual.

The wine ceremony is one of five Chinese wedding rituals. In this particular ritual, the bride and groom sip wine from delicate cups, which are tied together with red string. They then cross their arms, exchange cups, and drink again.

This ritual, "tuan yuan," is known as 'completing the circle.' When the couple shares the wine, it means that their lives together will be harmonious. In some weddings, the bride and groom are themselves tied together with a red sash.

Isn't that a lovely celebration of unity?

Hawaiian wedding- in Chicago?

Some couples dream of a wedding in Hawaii, complete with fresh flower leis and Hula dancers.

If that describes you, but maybe with some budgetary constraints - there is some good news. You can have a Hawaiian wedding right here in Chicago! You don't have to break the bank and fly to the islands - you can have the islands come to you!


Barefoot Hawaiian, recently featured on ABC 7's 190 North program, has everything you could possibly imagine for a tropical event- and more! Here you can rent props for your island-themed event, such as palm trees, giant parrot displays, and Tiki lanterns. You can even hire professional dancers to greet your guests with flower leis and entertain them with amazing performances.

You can visit Barefoot Hawaiian's very cool Hawaiian Shop in Des Plaines to find all sorts of decorations and party goods- even wedding cake toppers! And I would be doing a disservice if I didn't mention the Hawaiian shirts - they have over 500 different shirts!! And I'm not kidding - I've seen them!

So be sure to check out Barefoot Hawaiian for your tropical wedding (even if it's in the Windy City).

Girls' Night Out - with a cultural flair

Today I stopped in at Mah Rose Salon to inquire about henna parties. You can either go to the salon with your pals, or they'll even come to you!

Wouldn't it be fun for a Girls Night out? Or a Bachelorette Party?

You, too, can have happy henna hands......

Would you consider a henna party? Post a comment & let me know!

Henna hands are happy hands

After blogging about a bride who was "henna-ed" prior to her wedding, I got the itch to get my own henna hands. So, this past Saturday my friend and I went to Mah Rose Salon in downtown Des Plaines, where we both had our hands adorned. It was so much fun!

It was fascinating to watch Sadia, the gifted artist, at work on my hands, but I have to admit that I was distracted by the Bollywood music videos on the little t.v. in the corner. I couldn't stop watching! The music made me want to start dancing - which you really shouldn't do when someone is painting on your hands with reddish dye.

The only problem was, after we left, I had to go home to change clothes. We were going out to dinner with another friend and my sister (it was my birthday outing!) and I wanted to wear a cute outfit to show off my henna! Sadly, some of the drying henna paste came off of my arm, but the stuff on my fingers made it through the wardrobe change. It wound up looking great, even though my arm design was a bit lighter than my hands. Oh well. My brown jacket with the three-quarter sleeves showed off my fancy arms quite nicely, thank you very much!

We went out for dinner at Ethiopian Diamond in Chicago's Edgewater neighborhood. Since this is the area where three of us grew up, there were many refrains of "remember when." Our amazing dinner was followed by coffee and chatting at Julius Meinl Cafe, a Viennese coffeehouse on Lincoln Avenue. Sipping my steamy melange, I was transported back to Vienna, where my husband and I spent our honeymoon -15 years ago!

All in all, it was a wonderful day!

An inter-cultural wedding

Today I serendipitously (ha! I finally got to use that word!) came across the website of Dorai and Melinda Iyer, a couple who were married in a beautiful inter-cultural wedding in 2000.

Dorai, a native of India, and Melinda, originally from Chicago, dubbed their event "the Cool-Ass Hybrid Multicultural Weddingthingy". Well, as far as I'm concerend, their wedding looked very cool!

Day One of the celebration was the Mendhi Party, where Melinda and her bridesmaids decorated with henna. This is just the beginning - she had both sides of her hands done!
Day Two was the rehearsal, where the bride wore a gorgeous sari given to her by her in-laws.

Day Three was the Ceremony and the Reception. Rather than the bride being escorted or "given away," the couple walked together. The ceremony included Hindu rituals, including the Saptapadi, or Seven Steps Ritual. The couple took "seven symbolic steps together, toward a long and happy union." As the couple took their steps, the officiant recited the following:

Let us take the first step to nourish each other the second step to grow together in strength the third step to preserve our blessings the fourth step to share our happiness the fifth step to care for our children the sixth step to live long and happy lives together the seventh step to remain lifelong partners and friends, two imperfect halves to make a more perfect whole. With these seven steps we have bound our friendship. You have become mine forever. From today forward we will share equally in all that life offers us.

This was a such a lovely wedding, and a perfect example of how couples can blend their backgrounds to create a ceremony that is truly a reflection of them.

Visit their website to see more pictures and to read the wedding script. You can even view the menu - but don't do it on an empty stomach because it will make your mouth water!

Enjoy!